How to kindly deal with someone who has ADHD

This does not only count for those with the disorder, but also clients, employees, and customers who feel their needs are to be met in this moment and only this moment. Subscribe for The Glow Up weekly newsletter and never miss a single post!

This is straight off Google:

ADHD: A chronic condition including attention difficulty, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness.

ADHD often begins in childhood and can persist into adulthood. It may contribute to low self-esteem, troubled relationships, and difficulty at school or work.

Symptoms include limited attention and hyperactivity.

Treatments include medication and talk therapy.

People may experience:

Behavioral: aggression, excitability, fidgeting, hyperactivity, impulsivity, irritability, lack of restraint, or persistent repetition of words or actions

Cognitive: absent-mindedness, difficulty focusing, forgetfulness, problem paying attention, or short attention span

Mood: anger, anxiety, boredom, excitement, or mood swings

Also common: depression or learning disability

I have a loved one who has ADHD.

A friend who also has someone in their life with ADHD was telling me more of the symptoms that come along with it as we had a deep discussion on all the effects. It’s so much deeper than having a short attention span. Disclaimer: I’m not a psychology expert. I just have a lot of life experience with loved ones who have ADHD. 

A big problem people with ADHD have is that it’s a challenge to get their thoughts organised. Instead of asking all their questions all at once when they have the person’s time and attention, my family member would barge into my office as I’m working all day long for hours despite my rule of not to be bothered when working. 

They feel like everything is urgent. For instance, the house being on fire is equal to the semantics of a sentence at that time and it needs to be solved at that moment. It’s important to be patient, understanding, and have boundaries. When my office is being bombarded with unwelcome queries, I simply say I will give you all the attention you need, but right now is not the time. I have to work for a few hours, then I’ll pencil you in for that important discussion you wanted. 

It makes them understand that they are important, but unless it’s a death-defying emergency, or an exterior service that needs to be dealt with that only my presence can fix, it can wait. Priorities are not their strong suit as we have been on long flights where they bother everyone around them constantly forgetting something they forgot to get from their carry-on in the overhead compartment. It affects everybody around them and they do not realise it all the time. I have to let my loved one know it’s not necessary to add this stress on everyone else, nor is it kind or fair. 

By the time you get to the individual with the disorder after working long hours, they will either:

  • Forget what they wanted to mention, because it wasn’t important
  • Have written down the significant subject they needed to discuss 
  • Say, ‘It’s no big deal’ when they see over time it doesn’t need consideration

Simply remember to be kind, patient, and let those with ADHD know they feel they are valued with your full attention when the time is appropriate. Attention is human currency and everyone wants to be heard and understood. I hope this helps. Leave any questions or shared experiences in the comments below. I am always thrilled to hear from my fabulous readers.

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Gia G. Dixon
Gia G. Dixon

I’m Gia G. Dixon, an etiquette consultant certified under Royal Charter of King Charles III. Here is my guide to elegant style, high quality living, and little things that make your daily life glamorous.

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