I’m not here to entirely tell you to stop shopping. This is simply how I’ve officially drank the kool-aid and am joining the slow buy movement. Slow shopping is my gateway to eventually no shopping at all, because I plan to post some more hauls coming up, but I’ll get into that some more in a bit. Also, I started shopping again after years of not shopping, because I was putting every single cent I earned into my business a few years ago.
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How my shopping addiction started
Let me start from the beginning. I always knew I had a shopping addiction, but it was never about shopping for the clothes. At least in the beginning. When I was in my early 20s and had my own apartment, I would travel A TON. This meant buying really cheap clothes that I was willing to lose if my luggage was lost, but still something stylish enough, because I was taking pictures in order to frame these memories forever. That meant looking super cute while abroad.
The problem was I would never wear those items again simply because I took photos in them and they were cemented in my mind to only represent that memory of travelling. I would sell the items online on the Poshmark app where I was quite successful and still today move product quite quickly!
This cash back in my pocket fueled more shopping and trips. And this is also where the spiral started.
How my shopping addiction ended
There are quite a few points here I want to address. These are all things I learned the hard way.
- You’re never going to find that perfect item of clothing.
- You have to be fine with what you have.
- People are scientifically studied to be unhappier the more options they have.
I used to justify shopping by saying I’m looking for that one perfect thing, but it never is there until you say it is. Buying a new pair of boots when you already have a high quality pair that serves you well is. just going to make you not use one of the boots as much.
Warren Buffett, one of the richest men on the planet, said if you have a car, use it into the ground. something along those lines. I want to wear a good pair of boots until it has holes in it. I want to respect its existence by using it thoroughly and well.
Stop shopping for dupes. Get the actual luxury thing.
The problem with shopping for dupes is you will never find anything like the real thing. You will always be longing for what it’s like, and might even be embarrassed when you’re out in public with others who own it or know everything about how to find a dupe!
In addition, when I shop for the cheaper version of say, a tech item or faux leather shoe, it is never the same. I feel unfulfilled about it, then end up buying more things that are similar to fill that void. If I waited and delayed that gratification by saving for the real thing, I would have simply bought that only.
This doesn’t just help me cut down on wasting time and creating more pollution, but it helps me control my emotions and grow to have a state of mind of simple elegance. I don’t own a bunch of stuff that isn’t perfect, but one high quality thing I use all the time.
I shop less. Now what?
Recently, I donated 16 bags of clothes and felt so guilty with the weight of it always in the back of my mind. It was a weight lifted off my shoulders and I literally smiled, danced, and sang when I gave it away! A giant sigh of relief now opened me to a world of not having low quality, poorly made, season one-off trends.
Slowly but surely, I am redoing my whole wardrobe. Oh no, more shopping! Yes and no. I’m only shopping for quality. This does not necessarily mean designer. It means natural fiber items that draped better on the body. Less time shopping and more time being creative with my already existing wardrobe. Using what I already have while occasionally picking up well-made pieces from classic heritage brands I love. Not just shopping for items that are “hot” on “in” this season.
I only plan to buy things I need.
I’ve always had luxury styles in my wardrobe. I just use the cheap versions of, because I kind of didn’t feel worthy of using them. It’s such a weird psychological thing we just have to get over! Yes, I will still be posting hauls, but I’ve also found that so many designer goods that have never been worn are for so much cheaper secondhand. This way I can support local people, purchase quality, and have forever items for my eternal wardrobe!
Also, I’m rebuilding my entire repertoire of clothing, because I got rid of all the low quality garbage AND I have huge news coming out soon. It requires a whole lifestyle change, and that means what I wear everyday. Can’t wait to post about it! Still touching up some details, but subscribe to never miss a post and stay in the loop!
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